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Wednesday, December 15, 2010

NO more!

hello!
i wanna make a shout out..
lately..i am not myself..
i've been a pain in the ass for people around me
i've been a fucking child n all i do
is create drama n be a trouble maker

n so...
i deciced..it is best for me..
to deactivate n dlete my facebook account..
no more fb for me..
n i know...im gonna miss fb so much...
hmmmmmm..

im gonna miss my post..
when me posting my status..
my friend liking it..
dropping some coment..
i luv dat feeling..
but after 11.59pm tonite..there's no more..

no more uploading picture..
people liking it..
confirming my fren request
comenting on my fren post..
chatting in the chat box
private messaging..
n not to forget..
poking...

fb..im gonna miss u..
a year ++ of fb-ing change me..
leaving the world..
im gonna miss my fren..
n all i can do is..
wish them the best in life..
bye fb..

Saturday, November 27, 2010

i HATE IT!

I CANT HELP IT!
DAMN!
ITS NOT DAT I HATE MY PARENTS..
I LOVE THEM
BUT SOMETIMES..
UUUURRRGGGHHHH!!!!!

U KNOW..EVERYTIME I FEEL LIKE IM GONNA EXPLODE
WELL..I GOES STRAIGHT TO MY BLOG..
N SHOVE IT ALL IN
IM WRITING IN CAPS LOCK!!
DAMN IT!!

HOW WILL I EVER DEALT WIT THIS
BLAH BLAH BLAH
"I JUST WANT THE BEST 4 U"
YUP..MOM DAD...I KNOW
BUT!!!!

a)IM 20....20 YO!!!!...STOP TREATING ME LIKE IM 12!!
b)THEY WOULDNT ALLOWED ME TO TAKE LICENSE!...LIKE SERIOUSLY????!!!
DAMN IT!...I AM LIKE THE ONLY ONE AMONG MY
FRIENDS WHO DOES NOT KNOW HOW TO DRIVE A CAR!!
c)NO GOING OUT??!!...OK...IF IM A GURL..THEN I WOULD UNDERSTAND...
BUT...IM A DUDE..!..I'LL BE OK..

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
!!!!!!
n so..i smoke..i drink..
but im not a severe rebel 20-yo-dude!!
n i DONT DO DRUGS!
I DUN KILL N I DUN ROBBD!!
N I DUN RAPED!!

dats about it!!!
n they just know how to shut me down..
"boy..i wan't u to have a bright future..blah blah blah.."
i will have a bright future!..if they would have given
freedom to me..
n i know my limit!..i wouldnt do stupid things!..
..ok im out!!..b4 i lose myself to the world of
insanity rebelliousness!!!!..

Friday, November 26, 2010

roll eyes...@__@

hey!!!
its holiday...as usual..a very boring 1..
how'd u doin..
ok..i sounded crapd out!
i've done nothing..

ok...erm..its FB
u know how much i spend like my 25/7 of hours on fb..
n it irritates me
urgh!
my friends..not all of them..
just some of them only

a)i have some friends..apparently..some of them are korean artist..
hollywood too..n even models n sports athlete..
fuck them!...like seriously..use ur own fucking picture ok..
i know u r fucking ugly..dun care..just dun use some celeb pics..shame n u!!

b)my frens..oh well..my frens...why do u bother to add me up!
den u didn't even interact wit me..oh..u fucking asshole..
wat??!!..adding me just to fill up ur fren list
u pathehtic lil asshole cunt!!
dat applied to both my male n female fren
who never NEVER say a word n interact wit me

urgh!!..damn it!!..im full of anger..!!

n seriously guys???!!!
why n how can u fall for me
eewww..
u gross liltle creature..
yah..i know..im good looking
handsome n all..
but we haven't met
so NO..its a big NO-NO
u just went to another rejected list of mine
hey...slow down ur horses
lets know each other better..
met up..hang out..
then we can figure things out..

n a friendly reminder..
this is my blog..
i blogged about my life..
i know its kinda boring
but i like it..
n u haters out there(if any)
dun bother to read
cuz this is not a sex blog..a gossip celebrity blog..a educational blog
or even politic..
just a story of my life..

bla bla bla
ok racq..u blabbered way too much..
see ya peeps!!
i wanna dlete some fren..
:))

Wednesday, October 13, 2010

T i love u so much!!!

hey hey..im here again..:)
again..im going to talk bout my life
my fucked up life
so my readers..since this blog is basically bout my life
so dealt wit it ok..
complainer n whiner can go fuckurself

anyway...
i fall in love...
yeah!!
i wish i can tell the whole world who this person isbut....
damn..
i cant..

we met in facebook.
p/s:..i actually have set my eyes on this T a long time ago
but i dun wanna add Ti just wait..a few months past
and then just the end of this september
T add me as fren
i was like...wat??!!
so i was literally smiling to my ears..
confirming T

n we started to pm
haha
den i told her dat i used to admire her
but dont dare to
add T as fren.i just love dat moment.
i love T so much

haha..den i ask to be in a rltnship
T hesitate.
there is term n condition applied..
T wanna meet 1st before we jump into a relationship
i was like...ok.....
T said we'll met in miri..1 months 13 days from now
i said yes
i'll wait 4 T
1 month 13 days is nothingn T said
dat she love me too..

awww...i was in love wit T
falling hard!!
we chat..we text..
we webcam..we call each other
for the past few days
i spend almost rm50 on my hp
its worth it
i love T
btw:..T is so fucking tall..n im dat shortay..;(
i wish i can tell the whole world dat i love T
so damn fucking much
its good dat we're both in miri.
but due to some circumstances
we can go tell people dat we love each other
me n T decided dat
"its a secret we'll nvr tell..xoxo..GG"
but i post this in my blog
coz im sure nobody knows who T is
please dun ask why
the only thing dat matter isI LOVE T!

1 MONTH and 13 days sayang
i'll wait..i love u
i'll always b ur dior!
the perfume dat sticks to ur body
forever

p/s:..dat is the story of my personal relationship life..about my study..well..nothing much..sucks like a fucking asshole motherfucker..at least my rlationshp got bettr

I LOVE U T!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



Thursday, September 9, 2010

facebooking

its been like 4ever since i last post sumthing here..
hello there my fellow 21 followers..
luv u..
n those who read my blog
if any..i bet no one read it..

my post 4 today is about facebooking..
yup....facebook..
.im undergo my 2 weeks of boring holidays
and all i do is facebooking
like every single minute of my whole lot hols..

facebook is for people to catch up wit frens
from around the world
wat i realised bout facebook is
the facebooker is fake not real plastic n hypocrite
not all facebooker
just some of it

people removes me
from their fren
huh?!!
wat the fuck!
wat did i do to u
u add me up
then u remove me
fuck u!

some of my fren says to me
"racq..u r so annoying in facebook..i mean ur post full my news feed"
aww...i did...dats bad..
well if dats d case
u r cordially invited to remove me frm ur fren
but when i did nothing to u..
and out of the blue
u remove me..
dats a fucker douchebag right there

n facebooker is like so fake
i saw sum of my fren having their profile pic so hot!
too bad its not theirs..
they took it frm the celebutons..
awww...ur ashamed of ur ugliness..
nvm..im ugly too..but my profile pic is real..

n people add me up..
n i confirm them..
n dats it??!!
ur not going to say sumthing
wats the first sentnce whn u wanna b fren wit someone new?
i hate it!
if u just added me to fill in ur fren list
u better not add me though..

people add other people based on their profile pics
yup...
if u have this hot bombastic flawless pic
u'll be a one hit wonder of the internet sensation
having like 5000 frens
o...trust me...ur not connecting wit all of them
maybe its not ur fault
they add u up..
or vice versa...

facebook is for new people meeting new people..
connecting..make new frens
even create a long distant relationship
so why not do it?
??.....people nowadays..
is hard to predict..
this is my view on facebook

Monday, June 28, 2010

departure

hye guys..its me..ric the rac..im so bored so i decided to blog sumthing about..this time its LIFE..yup..life..just so all of u know..i was hospitalized last week 4 dengue..not to worry..its not really dengue..after further diagnosed by the doc..i just caught viral fever..
its a virus infection that cause fever to me..i was so hot..my body temperature rise but i feel so cold at that time..i was literally trembling my shaky bones..i even hv difficulty in breathing..its like i've suffocated myself..seriously..i thought i was going to die..n so i was hospitalized..i'll skip the process..the doc just inserted 2 IV's on both side of my hand..they said there's not much water inside my body..n suprise suprise my only cure is water..i think i hv a LOT of those water bottle they inserted thru the IV..i even need to measure my own urine when i pee..ewww!!..that is like the most disgusted gross things that a person ever do..i mean..measure ur own urine..urgh!!..

after 3 days..i was released...yea me..but my 3 days in the hospital was an eye opener to me..i saw people died in front of me..life is short..there was this old man..his bed is right in front of me..he has dis breathing thingy on his face to help him breathe..i was in the toilet at that time..only to hear people suddenly crying..that man just passed away..may him rest in peace above..n my condolences to the family..

i think that bed in front of me really hv bad mojo..the next occupants in it is in critical condition..again with the IV n a lot of breathing device connected to him..he was regularly supervised n monitored by the doc's n nurse..this grandpa came from a strong christian family..they have all gathered there to pray for the poor grandpa..n i think their prayer has been answered..he was in stable condition although he haven't woke up yet..thats the last thing i know bout him before i was discharged..i hope he recover soon coz he hv a very loving family behind him..

the rest of the patients in the ward is just like me..i saw a lot of love in the room..there's this very old couple..the husband was lying down in bed sick..the the wife is there wit him all the time..this old couple shows me that life is short n that they will survived it together..it broke my heart to see them undergoes this challenges at this age..there's also this teenage guy n his dad..his dad cares for him like he was his life..bringing him food..warming him up..making sure everything is fine wit his boy..they show compassion to me..

hospital for me is just a departure hall..u were there at this very critical moment..its either u survived it or ur not..if u do then live ur life..coz life is short..if u didnt make it..its heaven..or hell..being in the hospital makes me realized all the small things that brings up big impact on ur life..thinking that my life is cut short..i reminiscing all the sins i've commited..given a second chance is an eye opener to me..thats all for this post till next time..take care..

Thursday, June 17, 2010

wats luv 4 u??

wats luv...
gotta do gotta do wit it girl..
its bout us..its bout trust..

dats just a lyrics quoting from fat joe ft ashanti
yup..wats luv to u??
i've been thinking bout this lately..
people falling in luv..
people hating luv..

u know wat??..people said those 3 words..
i luv u..
do they really meant it..
do they even know wat luv is??
no..they dont

luv is the best feeling in the world..
u luv the person u loved 4 who they r..
not 4 who they r not..
u need to accept them..
all the flaws..
yup..partners usually accepts the flaws..
not so sincerely..
now thats a bad mojo..

when u luv sum1..
eventhough how bad-ass they could be
how irritating they are
how annoying ur partner is..
all u can do is accepting them..
its about acceptance..

luv is bout trust..
u need to trust them wit all ur heart..
if ur gf/bf said they luv u...
then..trust them..
n please...4 god sake!!
don't be too jealous over each other..
when they're late on replying
ur messages n calls..
do not act like ur a volcano dats about to errupt..
n do not jump to conclusion..
maybe sumthing holding them up..
like i said b4..
loving ur partner is trusting ur partner
coz they're the one u wanna live 4 d rest of ur day

when two peoples are
madly deeply in luv wit each other
there is always a bitter sweet memory that they shared together..
luv is not a skin deep feeling..
like u see this hot guy...
tall..handsome..perfect body..n u fall 4 him..@
pretty..smoking hot bikini body n flipping hair..n u fall 4 her
now honey!!
its not love..its LUST..

summing all the craps that i just wrote..
luv is about
*acceptance*
*trust*
*patience*
if u do not have this 3 things..
cut the bullshit out by not saying i luv u..
coz they might just believe it..

p/s:a luv point of view from mr hopeless romantic..

i've no idea wat title i should gv bout this post

hell-O!!..its me again..
ur over-emotional blogger..
dropping down some words in his blog..
its been exactly a month
since my last post..
that i haven't put out a new entry..

wats new on me??
nothing..i've been the same
since the last time u see me
@ heard from me..
i've got a flat n boring life..
u'll get bored of me eventually
TRUST ME..

im glad dat people are giving me compliment..
my friends in facebook..
u know...
saying..oh..ur handsome..(blah!!)
ur cute!..(eeww!)
ur nice n fun..
I DOUBT IT!!

the problem wit me is
i cant see myself thru my friends eyes..
idk wat they saw in me
its just dat its hard 4 me to believe
all the compliment

maybe its cuz of my very low(how low can i go) self confidence
i hv problem wit dat..
when people complimented me..
i just turn them down..
n saying like..
"oh puhleezz..when u see me in real life, i swear..
ur gonna take all ur compliments back"
n guess wat..im totally okay wit it

now..this may sounds weird..
but i prefer people telling me all my flaws
1)pimple face!
2)short!
3)dark
dats how i feel about myself..
not the other way round..

n believe me my beloved friends..
im not as nice as i look in the picture..
u dun wanna know
ALL THE BAD THINGS IVE DONE
n by that..
i mean A LOT OF BAD THINGS
dat u never thought i did..

now..thats enough of me bragging about watever this stuff is..
on to the next post..
p/s..my result..FAILED

Tuesday, May 18, 2010

liar liar pants on fire

liar
yup..im a liar
everyone..every people on this planet earth lied
no big deal..
i lied to people around me
they lied to me..
we're even

we lied coz we need to
coz the truth hurts
dats it
people lie just so
their deepest darkest secret
is kept a secret and nobody should know bout it
or
we lied coz people expect too much from us
n we didn't met their expectation
so a lie is wat we need to create
just to c their smile..

lies
to me is a variation of fake words
i lied about my feelings..
i lied about wat i did..
i called people fakes..
but im just like them..
i lied to my frens
to everyone.
i create lies after lies after lies just to cover up a single lies

i dun wanna come clean
i need to open up to people
but i can't
i did it already
nobody needs to know bout my lie..
its better if u dun know the truth
or the truth might make u
crumbling down to the ground
losing faiths n hopes n me
n making u a teary eyed
that will never subside
n things will never be the same again between
u me us n them




Friday, April 30, 2010

"L" - L O S E R F A I L E D!!


GOD PLEASE HELP ME!
HUH..
HERE'S WRECK-WELL A WELL ORIENTED EMO GUY
AND THIS TIME
EMO STRUCK HIS SOUL
AGAIN N ITS A HARD ONE!


SEE...ITS MY EXAM WEEK..
YEAH EXAM..PAPER..STDYING..
(GETTING GOOD GRADES)
JUST FINISH 3 PAPER..
AND I'M PRETTY SURE 2 OF MY PAPER
IS LIKE A PLANE CRASHING DOWN
IN THE SEA
AND EXPLODE TO A THOUSAND PIECES
OF FAILURE


SERIOUSLY..
IM TIRED OF FAILING
I DID LIKE EVERYTHING
MAYBE IM NOT THE MOST HARDWORKING DUDE
IN THIS WORLD
BUT I DID STDY..(AND I FELT LIKE I DIDN'T STDY)
BUT I ENDED UP FAILING
LIKE A PATHETIC LOSER
AND ALL IM GOOD AT IS FAILING


i envied those people
OMG..they are like freaking genius
dey dun even need to study
their head off
yet
thei results is like..(WOW)
i just dun want to get expelled from this u
it would be so embarrassing
but honestly
i might get booted out
next sem..
mom dad..im sorry


moving on to my relationship
yup
everyone knows im single now
just ending my 2 years on n off relationship
truth be told
i still luv her
haha
n i still miss her
i dun know how she felt now
nevermind
i tried to forget her
but DAMN!..it was HARD job..
all the memories we shared together
all the ups and down
all the sulking
currently..im listening to COLBIE CAILLAT
I NEVER TOLD YOU
dat song represent wat i feel about my relationship..
n my relationship quote is
I NEVER STOP LOVING U
IT'S JUST DAT I STOP SHOWING IT

p/s:
luv is universal
luv everyone u want
luv whoever u want
luv as many as u want


move on to my already crumbling apart life
finished all my 3 papers
one more to go and its not a good one
its one of my weakest subject of all
this monday is gonna be shit 4 me
then im finished..but can't go back home yet
OMG!!..i miss MIRI so much..
because of that stupid fucking asshole bullshiting motherfucker
camping that is freaking compulsory to attend
i'll be back on the 15/5
DAMN..it was like 2 weeks from now
ok..i'll survive
i think
and then there's the time
-waiting-for-result-to-be-released-
im dead..i dun want to fail
but i know im gonna failed
people telling me to think positive
but all i have os negativity
and worst of all
im gonna let my parents down
im sorry..
im no good as a human
i'd rather DIE
RIP WRECK WELL


Tuesday, April 20, 2010

together is not always forever..

hm..
yeah..stop calling me..
im trying to forget u...
but forgetting u is harder than i thought
i still luv u V..
n i know u still luv me
but i'm ready to let u go..
dat conversation we last had
make me realize
that we r not meant to be together..
no matter how strong our luv is..
there are other guys 4 u out there
i know there's a reason of our
on n off relationship..
thanx for always being there
all the time when we're together
when i need u the most
but now..
im trying to be stronger
by doing it alone
im ignoring u
so that i can forget bout u..
n i'm trying really hard
V i hope u understand..
i know its hard..
i don't belong here wit u..
i need to move on here..
n get over us..
it is written that we're together
but we're not destined to be together 4ever..
i pray that
u will find sumbody for my replacement
n thanx for the memories we've together..
ur my fist love that i would never forget..
VSK..im sorry..
take care..n i hope u forget me..


Saturday, April 17, 2010

disoriented n disfunctional

another emotionally post by me
yup..me..
i don't know wats happening to me this week
its my study week
but then again
i did NOTHING
i dun even stdy
like i seriously wanna hit the book
but am too lazy to just revise the first part
of watever in the notes..
i don't know wat i feel now
its just a mixed up of feelings
an overwhelmed of super negative
emotion, thinking and feeling
please GOD help me
i need to find peace
im locking myself in my room
doing nothing
wondering wats life has in store for me
sumtimes its just too tough
everything i did is wrong
i called people fake
witout realising that im
FAKER than them

TO be ConTiNUED........

Tuesday, April 6, 2010

e.m.o.t.h.a.t.s.m.e...

I CHOOSE NOTHING TO DESCRIBE
MY LIFE BUT QUOTES..

THE QUOTES DESCRIBE MY LIFE.

thanx for reading..RR



over written

halo peeps!!..and especially to my ONLY 8 FOLLOWERS..HAHA!!..HOW'D U BEEN??

I REALISED THAT MY BLOG IS FULL WIT WORDS.

now that's a big NO-NO in blog rules.

so im not gonna write A LOT of crappy stuff..

coz believe me honey..u'll get bored reading all my whinings..

so no words..just picz!!..

ok..maybe a bit of both..

then it'll make a good blog..(as if)..LAME..

sorry no pictures available for this post..i wonder why i post this post again??...hmmmmmmm.....

Friday, April 2, 2010

mr hopeless romantic


hell-o peeps!!..guess whose here??..its me!!..LAME!!!!!!..IM GETTING SO LAME LATELY..AND WEIRD..

i guess that's just me then..btw..recent update of my life:..

1)study:..can i quit stdy..seriously..pretty please..wit a cherry on top..got to test i've did..n suprise suprise!!!...i can't do it..blah blah blah...
2)relationship..wow!!!!!!..im speechlees...gosh!!..wat i am??..who i am??..do i really knew wat love is??..what love really is..like??..admiration???..jealousy???...obsession??..@ just a feeling..its super duper complicated..n im making it worse..
3)life:can't my life get any worse..damn..i should kill myself..but im scared..lolx...watever..just go on wit the BORING lame motherfucking quote..(LIFE MUST GO ON)



ON THIS POST..IM GONNA SHARE 10 QUOTES OF LOVE..
(SINCE IM A BIT EVERYWHERE N FAILURE IN LOVE,ITS GONNA BE A TROUBLE IN LOVE QUOTE)

1) when sumone really luvs u, they will never hurt u. And if they do,u can see it in their eyes, that it hurts them too.

2) At night i pray that soon ur face will fade away.

3) Harsh word hurt feeling but silence breaks hearts.

4) It is better to be hated for who u r then to be loved for someone u r not.

5) Hatred paralyzes life, love releases it, hatred confuses life, loves harmonizes it, hatred darkens life, loves illumines it

6) I do to my body what has been done to my soul

7) I wanna die, i wanna bleed, i wanna cry but all i can do is just keep waiting with a smile on my face and pretend the scars aren't really there.

8) I wrote this love note with my own blood so you know it come straight from my heart.

9) I sit here crying not because i miss u, but because i know i'll never have the chance to hurt u like u hurt me.

10) It's amazing how someone can break ur heart and but u still luv them with all the little pieces.

ERMMM..I DECIDED TO MAKE IT 15...
(COZ IM SO EMOTIONALLY CONFUSES N BROKEN N DISORIENTED WIT MY OWN FEELINGS NOW)
SO HERE'S ANOTHER 5..

11) I was born when u kissed me, i died when u left me, i lived a few weeks while u love me.

12) I cry for the time that u were almost mine i cry for the memories i've left behind i cry for the pain, the lost, the old, the new I cry for the times I thought i had u.

13) I was waiting 4 u last night under a broken street lights at least that light will be fixed unlike my heart.

14) Just when u thought everything would be so perfect everything falls apart.

15) Im gonna draw a picture, a picture of us, using my own blood, I'll draw it using a razor blade on my wrist..



















do we really know wat loves is?..do we really mean it when we say i love u forever and not break ur heart..but then u break ur promises..is luv is limited??..luv is universal..guy n a girl, guy n a guy n girl n a girl..they have one thing in common..it involves hearts and feelings..love is universal n no 1 can stop us from loving the one we love..even if the world against u and that person didnt luv u back..n ur new bff is ur tears..all the way down.....




Friday, March 19, 2010

its a girl girl world...

ok..boys out there..imma give u some info/facts about girls..haha..im on behalf of all the boys dude guys gay(although they're gay they're still a male..lame..lol..)..is goin to take a risk talking about girls that make our world go round..OUR WORLD..lmao..first of all a girl will always be girl..they're the drama queen of our life..now i'm gonna get real..every body knows girls have boobs(lol)..n the private parts..(i wanna mention bout it..but nahh..everybody should know..right)..n they got curves..now thats wat a girl is made..(sory for the transgender..ur not in the list..rofl)..


now..that should do for the intro..every guys shoud hv a girl in their life..p/s im still single..anyone..haha
..girl complete our life..n girls has a completely complicated variety of types in this world..the first one is the pretty one..now every guys luv this type..this type is so pretty inside out..n now im searching for one of them..they didn't need photoshop editing their photos coz they r so very pretty in a natural way..n their inside..now thats a bonus right there..warmhearted, loving caring understanding thoughtful..just a very angelic characteristic..a nice human being a pure untouchable piece of soul..i love u..whoever has that in their soul..AND there are this very pretty girl dat is so mean..talk about mean girls..ever watch it..girls n chicks out there..ur sooo pretty but inside..OMG..TRASH ON A TRAMPOLIN OR A TRAMP IN A TRAMPOLIN..this type is so mean a BITCH..SLUT..POSER n FAKE..wat else??..did i miss anything out..a backstabber hypocrite..plasticizers..lol..im in lost of word describing this type of girl..

now the ugly girl..they r not ugly..they're just unique in their own way..reality check this type of girl is so good at heart..they r way more better than those whore..damn it..so please respect this type of girl..n disrespect the bitches..haha..girl came in many shape n sizes..now this should be fun..there's the thin thinny like a stick..a just right; all the proportion is at the right places..n the big/plus size..hm..a thin one is like those model u see in runway or photoshoot...AMERICA'S NEXT TOP MODEL much??..they can be so anorexic..girls..u dun look pretty if ur a broom stick..put up some weight will ya..guys dun like thinny weeny type..plus its bad 4 ur health..VERY BAD...n they just right body..need i explain more??..they are perfect..pleez...maintain n keep up wat ur mama give ya..shake it dun break it girl..lool..n the fatso..no offense..there are always excercising for u..pleez i beg u..no lipo suction..very bad 4 ur health..n alert on wat u put inside ur mouth..just live a healthy life style than u get a better life..

girls feeling is so complicated..its as complicated as ur trying to solve an equation of calculus algebra + mechanics of calculation..they r so vulnerable sensitive n..........???..hm....u dun mess wit girls feeling..when they love u..they mean it..even if ur the ugliest human being in the world..in their eyes..ur perfect..treat them like wat they deserve..its like this tag u see in shops/malls..once broke consider sold..or in this case..if u broke a girl hearts..they broke urs(some of them)..they r so sensitive..their weapon is the tears..the tears can make or break u..girls need attention..n affection..so treat them like how u treated ur PS2,3 @ 4..handle them wit care n respect them..girls matured earlier than us guys..4 me..nah...we r more @ less the same..if ur in love..at that time girls need A LOT OF attention n luv..texting and sms-ing is a must..if not they are going to put their sulking face up..when girl sulks..its hard to comfort them..im so bad at comforting girl..maybe thats the reason why im single now..girls can be so determined n strong hearted..no matter who or wat u r..when they love u they really mean it..even if u guys spend a lot of time playing COD, L4D, DOTA, PES..they can still hv the patience wit us..jus dun get them mad..reply their sms asap..

girls ha a huge allergic on camera..need i to say more on it..CAMWHORING..when there's a camera in their hand..snap2..wit all the poses..lol..sumtimes i laugh at them..all those do-look-cute pose..OMG..n they LOVES to POUT..u know..the thing they do wit their mouth when snapping pics..gosh..GIRLS..u dun have to pout..u look pretty without pouting..when u POUT..U LOOK UGLY LIKE A TRASH CAN..N U LOOK STUPID too..sorry for that..

i think thats all about my thoughts on girls..a big APOLOGIZE if u hate it..well thats the truth..girls need boys n boys need girls..so peace out..do drop a comment if i miss anything out..take care fellas!!..

lady gaga ROCKS my telephone..:)

Thursday, March 18, 2010

boo-hoo ME!!

its been a while since i last reported about my life in this blog..well..not really reporting just COMPLAINING about my LIFE..again..yeah..so..u guys should listen to this old-enuff-whiner-who-whines...A LOT!!..a quick recap of wat i did in my already disastrous tumbling mumbling rumbling down LIFE...

1)...LAZY...
seriously????!!!..i wonder if there's some sort of award that actually exist in this world..that says..THE LAZIEST PERSON THAT EVER LIVE ON PLANET EARTH..now..i should totally be nominated for my uber-laziness that none could compare with..u see..i got this 2 test/exam(whatever u wanna call it)..like seriously all my friends is like freaking studying..n im the totally opposite..i wonder if they're still have their head on after all that studying n cramming..temporary insanity..duh!!!..n for me..yeah..me..im just LIVING..thats my occupation now..LIVING..an occupation only a lazy ass like me did for life..im just love living..haha..it makes me feel alive..n LIVING means sleeping eating relaxing n of course movie..hm...thats all 4 my lazy section i guess..well im too LAZY to explain more..on to next....

2)STUDY
remind myself again why do i write about stdying..although im not really STUDYING..i mean i did study but NOT MUCH..haha...i would compare my study life to a fish out of water..haha..like seriously peeps..im barely hanging on..again LAZYNESS overwhelmed me..n when i sit for a test/exam..i was like....fuck!!..did we learn this??!!..n im totally screwed myself..BIG TIME on it..n when the result came out..i would undergo a transition state..i would be so totally EMO..im emo now..but it worsen when i got a result like a piece of SHIT..too embarassed to admit..like recently..a 3/40?????!!!!!///wat the fuck!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!..there is seriously something is totally wrong with my brain cell...sometimes i wondered if i have a brain that actually work..LMFAO..haha

3)KA-CHING PROBLEMO
money makes the world go right round..for me..money makes me wanna buy everything my heart desires..but recently..there's a bummer in my account..damn it!!..need to cut it short..there's this one nite..me n my fren is going out having fun..u know..fun for me is CLUBBING..yeah..n on our way to like the hottest club in town..BOOM!!!!!!!!!!!...OMFG>>>>..our car got crash..dumbass..its an accident..fuck!!..that totally ruin my nite..then we need to pay rm1500(rm300 each)..and that just rooked my wallet n my already nothing account..n after everything is over..weird enuff we still rocked the club that nite..after wat hapened..LMAO..my friends..oh my!!..they know how to have fun..ty guys..so when is next??..cant wait..(didn't i meantion earlier im broke..)..lol..we're off at 7.30am the next day..xoxo to my party people..:))))))

4)RANDOMNESS TOTALLY EVERYTHING..
everything about life..hm..idk why..i feel like people around me is annoyed n hates me..A LOT..oh again my HATERS...fuck U!!!..i hope u die in hell!!!..do u ever feel like u wanna slit a person's throat although they done nothing to you..just seeing that person each day make me wanna took my russian roulette n give that asshole a head shot..recently i got pretty emotional easily..even if my friend came up to me they just anooyed me..(even if they done nothing bad to me)..i seriously need to hold a grip of myself..i should attend anger management control..@anger-emo mangement control..fuhh!!..n i think i have a lot of 2-faced friends!!!..do it ur way guys..ur smarter than me..n i just feel so weird that u guys failed to use ur brain to maneuver n think n act!!...at leat my brain still fuctioning for that purpose..

hm......wat else???..lose of word..sooooo..i guess thats the end of my 1st post..c ya my readers..
(n my 7 FOLLOWERS..i luv u somuch..GOD BLESS U GUYS)..XX..

Wednesday, February 24, 2010

fail

hye..this is me again..just to clarify everything this blog is the only place that i expressed wat i feel at the moment..n right know i feel so useless..i dun need ur pity or sympathy..just read watever im writing or posting coz its all bout me..fyi im a student at a local uni..taking civil eng..my heart is not in this actly..my brain is not for engineering..so i've decided to quit my study...my poiter last sem is so not good..its so low..and i barely survived the elimination..i think i can do it much better next sem but no..its worsen..i tried to like this course but to no success..i just got back from a test..a mid term test..n it is like the first time of my life as a student that i submit an almost empty answersheet to the lecturer..i wrote almost nothing..i dont know what the fuck the question is about..i go to a total blank..i think im gonna score 5/40 marks..thats good for a dumbass person like me..this is not the first time..its recurring everytime i sit for test..i did stdy but..i just dont know..im a fool..i really wanna quit stdying but there is somethings that stop me..my mom just text me before i went to my test..she asks me to stdy very hard..n never give up..n im doing the opposite of wat she said..i'll broke her heart if i said im quitting stdy..but i cant do this anymore..this is just to much for me to handle..the more i tried to force myself the more it hurts me...n then i was thinking..if im gonna quit stdying..wat m i gonna do..just stay at home doing nothing??..than im gonna b a burden to my family..i dun want that..i'd rather died than just giving them trouble..i've made a huge mistake in my life..the very wrong course i take n it gets the best of me..civil just swallowed me alive..im taking civil coz it sounds promising for my near future..im a bio student actually..n taking a physics major is the stupidest thing for me to do..i tried to stop feeling sorry to myself..try to b strong..but im getting weaker n weaker each day..i don't know wat i should do..i'm ashamed of myself..im the stupidest foolish no brain student of my entire class..they r so good that i feel so low talking to them..they know everything and i know nothing..i wish i can be like them..n not being ashamed of..but it turn out differently..to tell u d truth i've ever thinking of killing myself..how short minded of me right??..but i still have faith a small sparkle of faith n hope..just maybe..maybe that i can make this out alive..succeed like my other friends..now..im accepting everything..the truth hurts..im a failure..a quitter..a good for nothing..mom n dad..im so sorry..i break ur heart n crushing down ur dream..to whoever is reading my blog..this is me..think watever u guys wanna think..im off now..till next time..if there is a next time..

Friday, February 12, 2010

sorry 4 myself

and here i am again.feeling sorry for myself..this past few weeks have been a not so good for me..more like discovering who i am..i guess thats a little too late for it huh..
this is a story about a guy who has nothing to offer to the world..those who reads this post might think that he's just a pathethic good for nothing guy who is too ordinary that he feels useless in the bog world he's living..he's that short guy..very short..159cm..5'2..and he's 20 y.o..too short for his age that he feels so insecure..he can't model coz he's short dark and his pimplish face...now that is one horible being..lool..he knows nothing..he's taking civil engineering and he's that dumb ass..he's not clever but he's so lazy to study..wonder what is on his mind..next...he loves music..A LOT..but he can't even play a fucking instrument and can't even sing a single note..pity him..he got nothing special about himself..nothing that makes him special that the world would recognize..he got a girlfriend before..but he dumped her..thinking that he's not good for her..now that's wat i called stupid..i dont know what holds for him in the future..he suck's in his own life..i wonder he will survived his life or life just get the better part of him..all he can see about himself is just all the negativity and flaws..there's no extra special about himself..not the best looking guy..maybe the worst..i hope the world eats him alive..he's good for nothing..owh..i forgot to tell u guys who he is..he's the owner of this blog............................................RIP>>>>>>

Wednesday, January 27, 2010

her story mine

now..how should i start my story..a true one..i met this girl..let's call her V..i met V a year back..the first time i saw her i was like..this girl is something..that is back where im still studying in matriculation..(omg..people will know about this when they read..well watever)..back to the story..how i met her??..she n me are in the same class..glad that we're in the same class..i remember..the first time we talk..i think its about some task..or ice breaking..i couldn't really recall back..but during one of the ice breaking session..she's got a nickname title..(perenang)..lol..at first i was like..peranang??..ok is this girl swimmer or something..haha..its quite funny though..the way she smile..laugh..lol..love at first sight..than i ask for her number..omigod..wat am i thinking..at least i've got a solid reason for asking her number..i don't remember but its got something to do with some task or homework..and she gave it to me..hell yeah..then i ask her..is she's taken..then she answered yes..FUCK!!..ok..someone make me dissapear into thin air..omg..but then she added..its rather complicated..and i was like..hell yeah!!..haha..that night me n V spend some long hours texting each other..at this point..she's all im thinking of..although i think dat im so bad trying to snatch away someone's gf..but at that time things are rather complicated for her..so i decided not to..then a week after that..i receive 1 fucking asshole news..we're gonna reshuffle again..meaning me n her will not gonna be in d same class..fuck!!!..i curse whoever behind the reshuffling thingy..urgh..n so..we're not in the same class anymore...;(((..so this makes me n her texting alot during the nite..till some point i ask her the question..dun really remember..but not important..as long as she's mine..n about her bf..or should i say ex..well..screwd u..so loves is actualy blooming around us..u know..haha..things are going smoothly for us..we go out..the library..study date..lol..i didnt learn anything..then during the weekends..we go out..but not so much..coz she's having church on saturday n mine on sunday..but we still manage to find time to go out..and then it was my fault..who brings our love cam crashing down shattered like a glass hitting the floor..and then me emotional state gets the best of me..u know dat song from katy perry hot n cold..dat is so me..i can be nice to her n after that its the other way around..when im moody i wouldnt reply her text or calls..but she's always be ther for me..when im having problem..she'll help me..console me..motivate me..she's an angel..n wat i did to her..she deserve someone better than me..now that me and her has become just friend..ONLY..things would b a whole lot different..and for this coming valentine day..i just hope that she finds the right guy for him..who treat her the way she should b treated and love..x0x0 V..

Tuesday, January 19, 2010

HATE LOVE HURTS FEELINGS

CRYING
I cry for the time
that you were almost mine,
I cry for the memories
I've left behind,
I cry for the pain,
the lost, the old the new,
I cry for the times
I thought I had you

YOU
If you don't know,
then ask me.
If you don't agree,
then argue with me.
If you don't like,
then say it to me.
But don't keep silent
and judge me.

LOVE

Have you ever been in love?
Horrible isn't it?
It makes you so vulnerable.
It opens your chest
and it opens up your heart
and it means that someone
can get inside you and mess you up.
You build up all these defenses,
you build up a whole suit of armor,
so that nothing can hurt you,
then one stupid person,
no different from
any other stupid person,
wanders into your stupid life...
You give them a piece of you.
They didn't ask for it.
They did something dumb one day,
like kiss you or smile at you,
and then your life
isn't your own anymore.
Love takes hostages.
It gets inside you.
It eats you out and
leaves you crying in the darkness,
so simple a phrase like
'maybe we should be just friends'
turns into a glass splinter
working its way into your heart.
It hurts.
Not just in the imagination.
Not just in the mind.
It's a soul-hurt,
a real gets-inside-you-and-rips-you-apart pain.

Wednesday, January 13, 2010

doc love

now..how do i start this..lots of people asking me why r u still single..lol..coz im not really in the mood to a relationship at the moment..reality check..i learn my mistake from the last relationship dat i've..i gotta say dat it was a wild ride dat i tried to keep on holding..but at some point..u gotta let it go..n now im single n loving it..i think so..lol..so here i am..watching all the couples around me..my GOD..some was really in love..some just having a not-to-carry-the-world attitude..pity their partner..so i just have this bright fucking idea..of being a DOCTOR LOVE..WTF am i thinking..lol..dats is so self proclaim of myself..u know..just like dat movie HITCH..yup..dats me..rotfl..im so into my head right now..but seriously..GOSH..haha..anyway..i love hearing my friends relationship problem..they were just too much for them to handle..awww...sum of them didn't even deserve to be trated that way..basically my p.o.v on this is..both person SHOULD n MUST understand each other..in the sense that they know what their partner wants, needs, feels n thinks..plus u need to accept all the flaws in ur partner..if u wanna live wit him/her till d end of life..or should i say till 2012..(lol)..one more thing..curiousity always kill the cat..so the less u know the better..BUT it doesnt meant u should never knows whats going on..just dun exceed ur limit..and one more thing..JEALOUSY is NOT THE BEST POLICY(sumtimes)..so u dun go blindly accusing ur partner as a cheater..if so..then it will turn to i'll-dump-u-u-dump-me situation..if u doesnt have it..screwd u..!!..it will not last..sumtime i think dat LOVE is MAYBE just LUST..n so i created this:

ASHES TO ASHES
DUST TO DUST
IF LOVE IS LUST
ENDING IT IS A MUST

GOSH..THAT JUST RYHME..LOL..haha..think my crappiness should end here..just a piece of not-so-helping-advise and obvious blah blah blah from me..depend on my fellow reader(if there is any)..to give it a thought..take it or leave it..c ya..till next time..

from hitch 2
;) :)

Tuesday, January 12, 2010

randomness

hye'all...a new blog for me..i've deleted my blog in my wordpress n is now making a new blog here..still the same old me..my ups my very down n my very mixed up feeling and dilemma..the dude dat says a lot of fucked up things..i live wit dat..dat should be enuff for now..juz a VERY brief intro about ma blog..blah blah blah...i guess no one will read my blog so imma write watever i think n feel..a wide use of FUCK if u may say..lol..c ya people..;)